The strangest thing happened to me this weekend as I was drinking my third cup of sakau. I realized it was St Patrick's Day.
I don't think there has ever been a St Patrick's Day where I haven't realized it was St Patrick's Day. I thought back to last year, when I stressed about the decision whether to celebrate the holiday with all of my friends downtown or stay in for school the next day. My college's campus looked like a Saturday night when I got home from school. I don't know why, but that day and that seemingly stressful decision seems like yesterday.
And yet, Saturday there I was, 20 hours into my St Patrick's Day, and I didn't know. What's more, I didn't care.
You see, I just so happened to spend my St Patrick's Day in the greenest place I've ever been. A house you have to hike through the jungle 20 minutes to reach. The farthest house from the road. You couldn't hear anything except the river that ran right beside the house, a wonderful place for an afternoon swim or shower. On all sides, all you see is green. Bananas, sakau, betelnut, all within reach. I spent the day laying around. I took the most wonderful nap in the nahs, played with the kids in my host family, and played some bingo. The day ended, as usual, with sakau.
My host family was excited to bring me to their original house (we have been staying at the church's retreat house because my host father is the deacon) because "nobody can bother us here." So we sat, just the family, and passed around the cup of sakau. I mostly listened, trying to understand/ imagine what their conversations were about. Graciously enough, they are sure to turn to me occasionally to have a little English conversation or joke.
But I couldn't be happier than lounging on that wooden platform, listening to Pohnpeian, smiling when my family laughs and smiles because it's just the most beautiful thing, feeling the sakau melt my stresses away. Although I look back fondly on last year's St Patrick's Day, that reality seems so far from me now. Last year, I lived in a loud, crazy, fun world and I acted much the same. I was always surrounded by as many people as possible and felt guilty for wasting even a second just laying around. This year, I am surrounded by peace, quiet, and love, and I am finding myself becoming more like that. Even Kolonia, the town where I live (considered the city here but really the size of a small town in the US), seemed like a stressful place to come back to.
So, as I had the realization that it was St Patrick's Day, I looked around at the green, took a drink of sakau as a "cheers" to my friends and family, and I did not proclaim my Irish heritage. Rather, I wanted then, more than anything, to be Pohnpeian. And luckily, my host family has embraced me as one of their own, for which I am eternally grateful.
